Poems and Ponderings

Please continue reading, further down I have added my own thoughts in bold and cursive. ... From La Loba , Clarissa Pinkola Estes, Women Who Run With The Wolves. Pp.26-28 ....'the one that has many names. One who knows, it is the source of the feminine. The intuition, clairvoyance, who which listens carefully and has the true heart. She is the creator of the cycles,  is the life force' (Estes, 1994). And La Loba sang louder than the ground shakes digging up a bone. And then La Loba whispered all that is lost can be found, all that is dead can be resurrected. So my first task was to learn to understand within me that I should let to live and what I should let to die.  And in the process I should walk through the inner and outer worlds collecting my bones. And when my skeleton was complete, La Loba would sing about it and bring back the creature, my soul indestructible. Many nights passed until I find all my bones. Many expeditions to the underworld. Many ...

Nandini You felt my pain And made it your own You felt my anger And made it your own Until one day Your time had come to go I felt your pain And knew it was time To let you go on to your last journey Heavy lay your head in my hand You amber eyes looking into mine One last time you trusted me As so often you did before To do the right thing To make you whole again Go in peace my friend Until one day You will great me At the rainbow bridge Guiding me again And I will trust you Following your lead As I had done so many times before Freestyle, 2010 © JSZ, Angelique A farewell to my trusted and beloved Ridgeback Nandini, I helped her into this world on the 8. October 2002 and was with her as she left this world on the 27. February 2010. Nandini I am still missing you!

When writing as a therapy a person uses both hemispheres of their brain, which enables their experiences to become completely integrated into the mind. Writing has been proven to be an excellent form of stress relief for many people. All you require is a pen and journal, or even a piece of paper and a quiet area where you can explore and write down your thoughts. This makes it one of the most inexpensive forms of therapy, or where it is impossible to get to a therapist due to distance Writing can release the tension in your mind by providing you with self-knowledge and allowing you the chance to heal emotionally. So go and get some paper, make a cup of coffee or tea or hot water, sit comfortably, be sure you won't be interrupted and start writing. Start with something  like: Here I am sitting now and am supposed to write... no idea what I am supposed to write... -continue like this for a minute and two and you will see all the sudden you have finished a few page...

By nature I am a planner, it is very difficult for me to be just in the moment, so this poem is somewhat of a reminder for me to -Just be in the moment- I am getting there.... ;) This poem below is Pantoum Style   Be in the moment Feel the earth Dance barefoot Smell the roses Feel the earth Travel light Smell the roses Leave worries behind Travel light Cycle of ebb and flow Leave worries behind Look into the future Cycle of ebb and flow Dance barefoot Look into the future Be in the moment Pantoum, ©JSZ, Angelique, 2008

Why write?  ...A professor at a Kuwait University, brought together a group of  women.... to write out their psychological and social suffering... They found release in expressing themes of hidden emotion and inner turmoil. No matter where in the world you live, no matter how broken your life seems to be, the message comes through loud and clear: Writing heals. From HA Klauser , With Pen in Hand, Introduction Page xiii "I write because I am alone and move through the world alone. No one will know what has passed through me... I write because there are stories that people have forgotten to tell, because I am a woman trying to stand up in my life... I write out of hurt and how to make hurt okay; how to make myself strong and come home, and it may be the only real home I'll ever have." — Natalie Goldberg ( Writing Down the Bones: Freeing the Writer Within ) 

A favourite quote of my late mother was, Rising like the Phoenix out of the Ashes. She would  use this quote in order to describe her feeling after a heavy migraine attack. This poem below was written whilst I was in Germany, after leaving South Africa for good or so I thought, and I remember vividly that day, it was the day before my birthday, 17.February 2009, a dark winter's day, the heater trying its best to combat the - 10 degrees outside and my 2 beloved Ridgebacks gently snoring in front of it. I had just sat down and written my daily pages about my experiences in this country of my birth, which had become so strange, leaving me feeling like a foreigner in my own country. Tears were streaming down my face as I wrote, feeling abandoned, rejected, lonely, and in emotional and physical pain. The last sentence and here I quote directly from my journal: ... It is a lonely path and a painful one, but eventually and this I also know, I will emerge like the proverbial Phoen...